Almost everyone wants to be a good single parent for their children. They take parenting quite seriously and throw all their energy into raising their kids. This is equally true to parents who are single. They want to be good role models and teachers for their children. They want their children to be happy and healthy. Often times, they work towards these goals alone.
Being a single parent doesn’t leave much time for a social life outside the normal circle of friends and family. This is especially true for single parents of young children because of the amount of time and attention they demand.
Parenting while single can be lonely for many people because they are afraid of entering the dating scene. They often fear rejection from a possible date or long term companion because they have children. It is generally believed that the person who is dating the single parent is turned off by the extra “baggage”, as it is often termed. This is not the case so much today. Because the idea of single parenting is so common, it’s almost impossible to find someone over the age of 30 who doesn’t have kids.
Fear of another failed relationship often stops single parents from entering the dating scene as well. They figure they’re ruined and doomed to never be in a happy and healthy relationship with another adult. What many single parents don’t realize is they are not alone in feeling this way.
Being a single parent doesn’t mean that you can’t have a social life. It takes some planning and some of the spontaneity is gone, but it can be done. This doesn’t necessarily mean that in order to have a social life you have to date. It just means that you can go out and have fun with people your own age with similar interests. After spending the entire afternoon doing algebra problems with your 13 year old son, who wouldn’t want to go out for some fun with other people?
Here are some tips to having a social life while being a single parent.
- Hire a babysitter or recruit a family member to watch your children for a few hours a few times a month so you can go out without the kids.
- Join a bowling league, book club, or some other group where you have common interests with others in the group.
- Schedule a night out once a month with your friends. Hit the movies, the mall, or a local bar for some clean adult fun.
- If you are interested in dating, join a dating group.
- If you want to meet new people who are single parents like you, join a local support group for single parents.
- Be willing to try new things. If you’ve never been to a sports bar, try one out. If you’ve never gone bowling, give it a shot. You may find that you enjoy it and make some new friends along the way.
Don’t feel guilty about being social while being a single parent. Parenting is a rewarding journey, but even the most dedicated of parents needs to socialize with people their own age.